Jun 16, 2022 - Food and Drink

Don't skip the fries at Loretta's Northwesterner

A burger resting on the corner of a basket of fries.

The hand-cut fries are sold separately from the burger. Photo: Melissa Santos/Axios

I was interviewing someone in South Park the other week when they asked if I had been to the well-known neighborhood bar, Loretta's Northwesterner.

What they're saying: Of course, I replied — great burgers! (VICE knows about them, too.)

  • Yeah, the South Park local said — but don't sleep on the fries.
  • I thought hard, and couldn't remember if I'd had Loretta's fries or not.

So, I fixed that right away.

The verdict: I demolished the whole basket in maybe five minutes. They had just the right amount of saltiness and crispy edges, while still mushy in the right places.

  • The hand-cut fries ($4) are sold separately from Loretta's famed Tavern Burger ($7), which explains why I hadn't had them before.
  • The burger, if you hadn't had it, is a throwback to the kind you'd get at an old-school drive-in — small size, thin patty, white bun, American cheese. But also well executed and delicious.

The setup: I love everything about Loretta's — from the torn-booths to the peeling paint on the walls, to the bartender disparaging IPAs on a Wednesday afternoon (a person after my own heart).

  • There's a big, light-filled back patio, but I like to sit inside and ponder life in the dark while eating my burger and fries. Everyone has their thing.

Details: Loretta's is a bar, so only people 21 and older are allowed. 8617 14th Ave. S., with parking around the back.

A patio lined with barstools on one side and a group of people talking at a table on the other side.
The patio at Loretta's Northwesterner. Photo: Melissa Santos/Axios
An almost empty basket of fries next to a squeeze bottle of ketchup on a booth table with green walls and a napkin holder.
My preferred booth in which to ponder things and eat fries. Photo: Melissa Santos/Axios

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