Only Portlanders will get these bumper stickers
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Thomas Hils has it out for Dillion T. Pickle. But not for any vindictive reason — the gherkin-shaped baseball mascot just makes for delightfully absurd bumper sticker fodder.
- In one sticker, Hils accuses Dillion of dodging child support payments. In another, he suggests the mascot is two-timing women around town.
The big picture: Bumper sticker culture in Portland is prolific. Hils, who started the quirky bumper sticker shop Object Computer with friend Austin Wall, takes it a step further.
- We've all been behind a Subaru sporting something like "Don't honk or I'll cry" or "My other car is a sewing machine."
- But by incorporating hyperlocal quirks — like Franz Bakery's spinning bread sign, evading the arts tax or honking in the Highway 26 tunnel — the duo channels the city's dry, cynical sense of humor into jokes we're all in on.
"People who live here can make fun of Portland," Hils told Axios. "No one else should."
Catch up quick: Object Computer was hatched over drinks at Crow Bar about two years go, where Hils and Wall meet up weekly to discuss "schemes we usually never deliver on," Hils said.
- Their original plan was to persuade dive bars to sell tiny batches of obscure bumper stickers that would be "the funniest thing to only the smallest group of people." But it never materialized.
- Instead, Hils wound up with piles of stickers on his kitchen counter until about three months ago, when he decided to start listing them on Facebook Marketplace.
Turns out, that's where the audience was. Hils then launched an online shop and Instagram account, where new designs are rolled out on a regular basis.
- Some weeks, Hils estimates, they sell 10-20 stickers. Other times, they've sold out of entire batches.
- "I think we're not as precious about our cars here and there's a lot of artsy people," Hils said about the stickers' growing popularity. "The combination lends itself together."
- Popular designs include "Make the bread spin faster," "I'd rather be in Rajneeshpuram" and "The politician we need" with a photo of actor Kyle MacLachlan.
The bottom line: For Hils, the bumper stickers are less about making money and more about sharing a laugh with fellow Portlanders.
- "I just like the excuse to be as weird as possible with it."