A Floridian's theories on Taylor Swift's new song, "Florida!!!"
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Taylor Swift during one of her The Eras Tour stops at Raymond James. Photo: Octavio Jones/TAS23/Getty Images for for TAS Rights Management
Finally, Taylor Swift is entering her Florida Woman era.
What's happening: The pop star announced this week the release of a new album with the delightfully cringey Tumblr-era title, "The Tortured Poets Department."
- It includes a track featuring Florence & The Machine called "Florida!!!"
Why it matters: Swift is the most famous person on the planet right now, so, like it or not, how she portrays the Sunshine State in her music will impact its, ahem, "Reputation."
Zoom in: As great as it would be to see Swift pen poetry about the magic of our crystal springs or raise awareness about the plight of the Florida panther, her split last year with actor Joe Alwyn appears to be the leading theory around what the song is about.
- The breakup went public on April 8. Her first The Eras Tour shows post-breakup were April 13, 14 and 15 at Tampa's Raymond James Stadium.
Our take: We, at Axios Tampa Bay and Miami, have a few more theories. [Editor's note, April 19: The song is now out. Here's our analysis.]
Shifting in my hammock at Vinoy Park/dwelling on how he broke my heart
Look, we'd probably know by now if Swift ever hung out at St. Pete's beloved bayfront park. BUT her father, Scott, seemingly still owns a condo at Vinoy Place in downtown St. Petersburg that was broken into in 2020, and he was spotted at the Canopy rooftop bar as recently as last month, per the gossip outlet Deux Moi.
I don't like your little games/tracking my flights
In another recent Taylor Swift-Florida story, her lawyers sent a letter to University of Central Florida student Jack Sweeney demanding that he stop tracking the pop star's private jets, per NBC. Sweeney rose to prominence two years ago for using publicly available data to track flights linked to Russian oligarchs.
'Cause karma is my boyfriend/karma is his mom
Hear us out: Why does "Florida!!!" have to be about heartbreak at all? Can't it be about Swift's new love, Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce? And his mom Donna Kelce's condo in a beautiful, tree-lined neighborhood in Orlando? We, too, think a walk around Lake Baldwin can inspire art.
There we are again at the/chili cook off
Way back in 2008, when Swift was just a twinkle in pop music's eye, she played her first Florida show at a chili cook off in Pembroke Pines, near Miami. She was the third-billed act, behind Big & Rich and Gretchen Wilson, per the Miami Herald. Maybe we're in for a "The Climb"-style "I made it" anthem? We await with bated breath.