1 city, 3 teams, 8 hours: A running diary of a Philly sports marathon

Philly fans got the holy trinity this weekend: Phillies, Sixers and Flyers all playing on the same day.

Why it matters: It's the dream — posting up at a pub or plopping on the couch, beers and cheesesteaks in hand, for eight straight hours of sports-induced anxiety.

• Here's our running diary of Saturday's drama:

4:14pm: OK, can we get a Schwarbomb to start this party? Let's go Phils. No, we cannot. Kyle strikes out on a change-up. Love that for us.

🤬 4:55pm: Full count. Uh-oh. Pitch misses the plate, and Andrew Painter just forced in a run. Quick mound visit. I wonder what they told him: "Try throwing strikes."

4:58pm: Whatever they said didn't work. Painter walks in another run. Death by a thousand almost-strikes.

5:00pm: Line drive to right field. Gloved. Inning over. 2-0 Marlins. Not exactly a Picasso of an inning for Painter. More like a finger painting.

⚾ 5:06pm: Schwar bombs. Seven straight at-bats for Kyle. Seven straight strikeouts — a masterclass in consistency.

5:55pm: Cameras pan to a Philly fan wearing a Flyers jersey and a Sixers hat. Phils down 4-0. Another Schwarber strikeout. The man could be dressed for all three losses.

😞 6:30pm: Trea Turner flies out to midfield. The Phillies are shut out for the fourth time this year. Interim skipper Don Mattingly loses his first game as interim skipper. Harbinger?

7:00pm: The sports gods are smiling on Philly. ESPN reports that Celtics star guard Jayson Tatum is out of Game 7 with stiffness in left knee.

8:18pm: The Celtics have cut the lead to two, and Kelly Oubre just picked up his third foul. Basketball: a game of runs and emotional instability.

💪 8:22pm: Call him Swoll (pronounced: Swo-el) Embiid! The big guy muscles in a layup and hits the free throw to finish the 3-point play, giving the Sixers a 44-40 advantage. Not today, Boston.

8:29pm: In the time it took me to switch back to the Flyers game, they've given up two goals. Guess it's not a channel-toggling night.

🍺 8:33pm: Frustrations bubbling over. Nick Seeler delivers a crosscheck and is sent to the penalty box. Time for a beer.

8:36pm: Little wins. Flyers escape power play without giving up another goal. Cheers to survival!

8:41pm: Flyers on the power play. They're last in the league in converting on power plays. Time to change that! Narrator: They did not.

8:50pm: Flyers back on the power play. You can guess what happened.

🍎 8:57pm: Do you like apples, Boston? How do you like dem apples? Tyrese Maxey nails a deep 3. Celtics coach Joe Mazzulla scowls from the sidelines.

• Maxey hits another bucket, part of an 8-0 Philly run. Mad Max forces Mopey Mazzulla to call timeout.

9:06pm: Terrible defensive sequence for the Sixers, giving up three offensive rebounds, leading to a triple from Jaylen Brown.

• Embiid, looking like he chugged 18 energy drinks before tipoff, goes right down the court, backs down Brown and puts in a little baby hook over his head. He lets Brown know about it.

9:23pm: Officially giving up on the Flyers. Noms on pita bread to self-soothe.

9:29pm: Our hopes are riding on the Sixers. Up 10 in the fourth quarter. But you know the Celtics are going to make a run.

• Case in point: Brown hits a layup to cut lead to six. Timeout Sixers.

🏒 9:32pm: Our faith is unredeemed. Garnet Hathaway called for slashing — slashing the time I have to waste on this thrashing.

9:40pm: Sixers are falling apart. I'm falling apart. Paul George is falling apart. He just fouled Brown, who absorbed the contact to complete a 3-point play.

• Embiid gets his knee clipped and goes down. I clutch my chest.

🏥 9:41pm: Someone call a medic … for the Celtics. Unfazed, Swoll Embiid pops right back up and buries a 3 at the other end.

9:43pm: Camera pans to Tatum on the bench looking exasperated. And all I can think is: Please, Sixers, do everything in your power to keep this wet towel from adding new corny content to his highlight reel.

9:55pm: Brown's potential go-ahead 3 rims out. Sixers dodged a sniper shot. Maybe it's their year. Did I just jinx us?

9:57pm: This. Is. Philadelphia! Spartan-like finisher from Maxey gives the Sixers a five-point lead. Cue the Rocky music.

• Maxey and Embiid had 17 of the Sixers' 19 fourth-quarter points.

🍏 10:02pm: Camera pans back to Tatum with his arms crossed. One word: apples. #GrannySmithEnergy.

10:04pm: It's over, 109-100. The Sixers overcome a 3-1 series deficit to beat the Celtics in the playoffs for the first time since 1982.

• Embiid, who scored 34 points, completes the series comeback with a kid toss. MVP behavior, dad edition.

🦷 "Daddy, look at my tooth," his son, Arthur, says during the postgame interview.

• The tooth fairy left apples under Tatum's pillow.