Noob's guide to a Union game

The Union are back home tomorrow against Toronto at 7:30pm.

• Since I went to my first Union game a few weeks ago, I put together a quick stadium guide for the uninitiated.

Why it matters: The Union made last year’s MLS Cup but could use all the support they can get after a rough start to the season.

• And the games are freakin' fun.

🥁 The atmosphere: Before the match, the Union roll out a massive drum and have a bigwig like the Phillie Phanatic bang on it to rile up the crowd.

• Fans turn their backs to the visiting team during pregame intros, and you’ll hear the roar of “sucks” when each opposing player is announced.
• Phang, the team snake, looks more like Spyro the Dragon.

Southern discomfort: The Sons of Ben rival the rabid soccer fan clubs in Europe. They make the "River End" — the south side of the stadium — an intimidating den for opponents, banging on drums, chanting “Union” and singing throughout the match.

• Plus, visiting team colors — and red (the color of rival New York Red Bulls) — are banned here. And you've gotta stand the entire game (minus halftime).

Yes, but: We still felt that energy sitting on the north end underneath the jumbotron.

The food: Chickie and Pete's, PJ Whelihan’s, the Pretzel Factory, Nonna's Pizza, Philip’s Steaks and Hot Dog Nation — greasy fare, in other words.

• Scoops 'N' Smiles has a bunch of ice cream flavors, including Almond Joy and caramel apple.

💭 Isaac’s thought bubble: The BBQ pulled pork sandwich at Cheryl’s Southern Style is top-notch, and their loaded chili has generous chunks of brisket. I overdid it.

👉 Pro tip: Scoring tickets to the Sons of Ben section is like surviving the Hunger Games, so plan ahead.

The bottom line: After every win, they play The Turtles’ “Happy Together.” The Sons of Ben hold up fatheads from the player of the match. And that player rings in one last ear-shattering round of drum strikes.

Be smart: You can still grab tickets for Saturday’s game on StubHub.