Chicago, can we talk? Are we done with the "rat hole" yet?

What's happening: Roscoe Village's infamous sidewalk tomb has captured the city (and beyond) for the last few weeks.

Yes, but: We can't believe we're still talking about it.

• The thing is: After careful examination, we're pretty certain this viral Chicago moment has run its course, and it's only a matter of time before the city spoils the fun.

So if it's your first rodeo, here's how these things usually go.

🔍 Discovery: Artist posts photo of rat-shaped (maybe squirrel) hole on Roscoe Street. Algo hits just right, securing millions of views.

• Inevitably, locals remind public they've known about imprint for years.

Publicity: Local journalists (including us) descend on social media sensation to join fun (but also for clicks).

📰 National spotlight: Big dogs like the New York Times (and maybe even the Daily Mail) swoop in because they want clicks, too!

Memorialization: Throngs of people visit curiosity like it's Strawberry Fields in Central Park. Shrine is built. Animal is nicknamed (Chimley). Couple is married. Malört is involved.

🤑 Commercialization: Creatives and entrepreneurs make T-shirts, cookie cutters, drink specials, you-name-it to capitalize on moment.

Improvisation: Improvisers, aka 70% of Chicagoans ages 22-28, use public sidewalk as set for videos, streams and photos while leaving behind fliers for their black box theater show in Rogers Park.

📪 NIMBYs: Life becomes miserable for neighbors, who are afraid to spoil fun but also who would like to get their mail.

Fun's over (part 1): Someone tries to fill rat hole but only fans flames. Chicagoans make rat hole whole again.

Fun's over (part 2): Neighbors file complaints. City under pressure to take action.

Jumped the shark: When they (likely) do, everyone is outraged. Sanctimonious, sardonic local writers (named Carrie, Justin and Monica) roll their eyes that this thing ever got so big, destroying any joy that still remained … until another alligator is found in local lagoon.

Did we get that right? 🤣

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A theatrical adaptation of musician and songwriter Sufjan Stevens' beloved "Illinois" album opens Sunday at Chicago Shakespeare Theatre.

Driving the news: Chicago Shakes' "Illinoise" will run at Navy Pier's The Yard through Feb. 18.

Why it matters: The production draws from themes in Stevens' 2005 ode to Illinois landmarks, history, and people — and will incorporate hits like "Casmir Pulaski Day," pointing to the state's idiosyncrasies, that earned the album its cultish following.

The big picture: Many people, including a queer and Christian fanbase, connected with Stevens' album for its beautiful orchestration and literary and honest lyrics.

Details: In Pulitzer Prize-winning playwright Jackie Sibblies Drury and choreographer Justin Peck's theatrical adaptation, characters share stories around a campfire.

• "I couldn't tell you if it's a concert or dance-theater piece or musical," Peck told Pitchfork last year. "It's somewhere amidst all that but feels like its own thing."

Context: Timo Andres, who did the musical arrangements, tells Axios that all the songs from the album are part of "Illinoise" in some way.

• "There's a lot of detail from the original album ... everything from the instrumentation to lots of tiny details for the 'real heads,'" says Andres.

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For every 1,000 people in Illinois, nearly six were prescribed a drug that belongs to a buzzy class of diabetes and anti-obesity medications last year, Axios' Tina Reed reports.

The big picture: Some Southern states' prescribing rates for drugs like Ozempic and Wegovy were more than double Illinois'.

• The states with the highest rates are also among those with greater prevalence of diabetes and obesity, per CDC data.

Zoom in: In Illinois, about 30% of the population is classified as obese. The number of deaths from diabetes in 2021 was about 21 per 100,000 people.

🎙 The White Sox have tapped ESPN's John Schriffen as the new TV play-by-play announcer to replace Jason Benetti. (Sun-Times)

🍺 Six employees at Skylark have purchased the Pilsen bar after the previous owners announced last year they were retiring. The new proprietors say the bar will stay the same. (Block Club)

🏫 Cook County Board officials have moved to exempt some suburban schools and park districts from a county ordinance on paid leave. (Tribune)

📅 Upcoming events around the city.

FreakShow & Tell Live at Sideshow Gelato on March 30: Sideshow performer Thom Britton created a stage show to answer the barrage of questions he regularly received before, during, and after his performances. $20.

Hosting an event? Email [email protected].

It was never in doubt.

Bulls icon Phil Jackson won our best Chicago coach tournament — and it wasn't even close.

The intrigue: Jackson joins his 1996-98 Bulls in our ring of honor, as Axios Chicago readers already voted them the best local sports team of all time.

We'll be back with another best of Chicago tournament next month!

Jason Hammel came to Chicago in the '90s to pursue a career in creative writing but instead blossomed into one of the city's most celebrated chefs.

What's happening: The James Beard-nominated chef behind Logan Square's Lula Cafe finally marries those two talents in his new cookbook, full of moving stories, thrilling recipes and handsome design.

We recently caught up with Hammel and asked what would make his best day ever in Chicago.

Breakfast: A slice of quiche and sticky bun from Floriole.

📖 Morning activity: "When I have a day off, I like to sit in the sunroom in the back of the house and read. That's a gift to myself."

Lunch: Le Bouchon. "My wife and I used to go here before we had kids and recently treated ourselves to lunch of Alsatian tarte, Lyonnaise salad and moules frites."

🛶 Afternoon activity: Taking an Electric Boat off of Rockwell or a kayak off the pier near Whole Foods.

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