Mailbag: 25 spicy letters on popcorn, parking and cheap beer

General

“Lifelong Charlotte resident… Love this website… very informative… Keep up the good work!!” – A

“Cash Confessional… how in the hell do all these people have dinner and drinks for like $25?!” – D

“All right guys, we love you and we’re here for you, but it’s time for an intervention. Lately your use of the term ‘on point’ has spiraled out of control. While it could be worse, you could be into the harder stuff like ‘on fleek’, you’re still hurting those around you and i don’t think you can stop. Are you ready to admit you need help? Cocktails, cupcakes, coffee. All these things can’t be ‘on point’. How big is the point? A point big enough for all that would have to be quite dull. Which is how i’m beginning to view you.” – P

“This whole Pokemon go thing. I’m too old to be interested now or ever, and my knee jerk opinion was that it’s pathetic how people are so tied to their phones (I sound more and more like my dad every day). Then I was running through Freedom park the other day and came upon hordes and hordes of people wandering around playing the game. I thought, this isn’t so bad; at least these kids are off the couch getting fresh air and a little exercise. So I felt good about it. Then the next day I was out walking my dog and I saw an obese mom driving her obese kids around the neighborhood, stopping to ask people if there were any [whatever it is pokemon players look for] around. Any my heart broke.” – A

In response to: How to order from the 100+ flavors at Tastebuds Popcorn and What do the new hamburgers at Cantina 1511 look like?

“Is this a freakin joke?? How stupid do you think your readers are?? Today, Andrew Dunn wrote an article about how to go into a store and buy the one product that the store sells. Andrew, is it really so complicated that you need to publish a step-by-step guide on how to walk into a damn store that specializes in popcorn and get a bag of popcorn?? Andrew isn’t the only one who royally pissed me off today. For God’s sake, Ted took a picture of a damn hamburger and managed to write an article on how it was just okay. Wow I can’t believe they put TWO patties on a hamburger!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Andrew, I know how to go into a popcorn store and order popcorn. Ted, I know what a hamburger looks like. These stupid articles have absolutely ruined my weekend and my weekend is usually the best time of my week. I hope you think about that tonight when you go home and change your baby’s diaper and contemplate why people get dogs and not babies.” – CNL (Chicken Nugget Lover)

Note: Same person, 30 minutes later…

“Sorry, :). Hey guys its me again. I just want to apologize for the way I reacted to your horrific articles on hamburgers and popcorn. You see, I already know how to go into a store and choose what flavor popcorn I would like, but there are some people that might get overwhelmed by the shear thought of having to choose a damn flavor!! I mean, when McD’s came out with multiple dipping sauce options for my nuggets, my head almost exploded!!!! And Ted, it was not nice of me to make fun of your double patties. There are people out there who have never seen a hamburger, and it was your civic duty to bring this ground beef phenomenon to the people of Charlotte. You both are truly doing God’s work and the people of Charlotte are lucky to have you guys here to introduce us to trendy foods like hamburgers and popcorn.” – CNL

In response to: The athletic fields at Renaissance Park have been closed for good — but golf is safe

“That’s troubling and surprising about the Renaissance fields. Lots of youth sports teams rely on those throughout the year. Is there no possibility of a remediation plan? Seems like a lot of wasted space going forward.” – T

In response to: Daily parking Uptown has gotten much more expensive

“Thanks for this article! I work uptown in the Hearst Tower and since I have worked here (2-3 years) it has gone from $115 a month to $150 a month when Preferred Parking took over. I feel like Preferred Parking has a monopoly on parking in Uptown and charge whatever they want. Plus they should honor some type of grandfather rule rather than increasing it $10 every few months. Everyone that works Uptown complains about parking, its a pretty big chuck of money when taken out of your check monthly. It takes some of the glamour out of working in these awesome high rise buildings.” – L

“I split my time between Charlotte and Honolulu. Parking is a huge deal for us in Hawaii: especially on Oahu. My office used to be at the heart of Honolulu right near the Iolani Palace. I will tell you that early bird specials around downtown Honolulu are about $6 to $8: some areas of the town might be $10, but I can see King Kamehameha from my window so that’s a good indicator. Most of us who work down there lease spaces, so it isn’t that big of a deal: $200 a month roughly depending on location and tandem, etc. However with Charlotte having infinitly more parking than Honolulu, that $6 cost is not a supply and demand issue. The supply is there, the garages are just gouging since nobody is complaining. In Hawaii everybody uses apps like BestParking and ParkMobile to find open spaces and compare rates. It’s in the culture. Moreover, the news regularly reports on costs and the local officials respond. So, maybe in Charlotte the biggest challenge is community interest. The cost will go up until there is an outcry and then it will stop increasing. But it will never go down, so it is best to stop it on the rise. No reason Charlotte should be as expensive as Hawaii. Cost of living in this area is 50% less. Everything from Milk to Housing is less. No reason with all the ample parking here that that would be equal to one of the most expensive places in the U.S.” – B

In response to

“not every zip code in Charlotte has to be ‘cool’ to millennials and their pals. South Charlotte IS cool because it IS suburbia without being too far from “cooler” places where you can go occasionally without kids and pretend you are “cool” again. 🙂 While there are many problems with south Charlotte, not being ‘cool’ enough to attract young people is definitely not one of them.”

In response to: The NBA has officially pulled the All-Star Game from Charlotte

“Meh. An All Star experience won’t make the team any more competitive than without one, but at least we won’t have the traffic associated with a large-scale event or have to host the unsightly lizard that Commissioner Adam Silver is.” – A

“I’m very pleased to see that you’ve maintained your neutral stance and report the story, not be the story. I like using your media to find out what’s going on in and around Charlotte.” – G

In response to: Why aren’t young Charlotteans open to couples therapy?

“Mary Gross is my spirit animal. I look forward to reading her articles and love her voice. She is not pretentious or dramatic. It’s refreshing to hear from a woman who isn’t self righteous, but doesn’t sound like a pushover either. Love what she wrote about therapy — Charlotte would be a much better place if people went to a professional to talk about their issues rather than hide behind polarizing viewpoints. Kudos to Mary for another great article and I hope to read more from her in the future!” – R

“Hi! Just wanted to say I LOVED the article on couples therapy a few days ago. I can’t encourage therapy enough to my family and friends, but there is a stigma and we keep it on the DL with most. My husband and I started going to therapy about six months into our marriage. I don’t want to exaggerate and say it was the best thing that’s ever happened to us, but it definitely put us in a place that just made life EASIER. It helped us learn the tools to deal with certain situations, and validate feelings we have and feel guilty about. Every session we came out more in love, and more on the same page. We dated for four years before getting married, lived together for three, moved across the country together, and been through so much, so we felt SO CONFIDENT getting married. But marriage brings up so many things you never anticipate. Thank you for the article and perpetuating all the positive things about couples therapy. It’s truly for any and every one. Can’t recommend it enough!” – L

In response to: FIRST LOOK: Here’s what’s coming to the Pepsi site on the light rail line — New Bern Station

“I feel sure I am not the only Charlottean that is feeling the way I am feeling. How in the hell are all of these apartments being justified? How can the city boards sleep at night knowing they keep allowing our trees & landmarks to be torn down for more apartments & parking decks?!?! It is a terrible injustice to our city. I understand we are a growing city, and there are definitely some benefits to that. What happened to the days of keeping the beautiful old buildings & renovating them? I have been upset about the apartments for a long time, but then when I read the Pepsi building is being torn down for apartments, I had to respond. Am I upset because the Pepsi building is being torn down? Maybe a little, but it is more because of what is going in its place. The activity that is happening on Central & 7th is such a disgrace. Except for the greedy ass developers, I feel sure nobody is happy about any of these additions. I realize I am just spinning my wheels here, but it makes me feel a little better to get this out there.” – M

In response to: What’s this “Moms in Charge” Facebook group and why is it all the rage?

“Thank you for your article about the new Facebook group for moms looking to buy and sell baby items that was written in May. My husband forwarded this to me and as a mom of 1, with one on the way, I was very excited to learn about a new way to connect with other moms. I am also new to the area so making new mom friends is especially important to me and my children. The article began by discussing the importance of making connections as new moms, but then concluded by explaining that you have to know someone that is already part of the Facebook group in order to join. How are we supposed to get to know new moms if we’re excluded from the very groups that are being promoted as places to make those new connections? I’ve been a mom for 2 years and am officially tired of exclusive groups such as this which keep well-meaning moms out. It’s like the high school cafeteria and the ‘cool’ table all over again. Next time you have something to share, make sure there aren’t prerequisites based on who you know in order to get involved. I suggest you look into writing about truly open organizations like the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society’s Moms in Training or other Facebook groups like Charlotte Moms, who welcome all moms with open arms.” – E

In response to Andrew’s newsletter intro on July 26

“I think it might be easier if Andrew rounds up 3 donut-loving friends.  :-)” – L

“Doughnut flight is genius. Make it happen; tell them I’d pay more too.” – G

In response to: What Uptown Charlotte could look like with protected bike lanes

“Loved Andrew’s piece on bike lanes in Uptown. I fully support it but based on the renderings it appears that putting in bike lanes will take away a lot of free parking spots in Uptown. Are there solutions that other cities (San Diego, Chattanooga, etc.) are putting into place to compensate for this? Is Charlotte considering this as well?” – N

In response to: Our Axios Charlotte Today iOS app is now available for download

“The app is beautiful! It couldn’t be better! Great job, CA team!” – J

“Thanks for the App! The design is simple and straight forward. I really like the separate tabs for events/jobs/news. I look forward to using it often.” – H

“When will the Microsoft app be released? Yeah, that’s still a thing.” – K

“Love the app! Especially the Events listing. Wowser!!” – M

In response to: 10 outdoor dates to try before summer ends

“In your ’10 outdoor dates’ article the lady in the Fury 325 picture is defiantly giving everyone the bird. My office personally found it hilarious, wasn’t sure if it was on purpose or not? ha.” – B

In response to: Are Agenda readers going to vote for Hillary or Trump? Survey results

“You obviously have a young audience. I enjoy your publication even though I happen to be an old guy. The results of your poll are not surprising, but I sincerely hope many of your young audience will reconsider before November. Trump is certainly not a great choice, but he is, by far, a better choice for our country and the future of your young audience. We must change the PC world if we ever want to have real dialogue and actual solutions, not just pandering. Young Americans of all persuasions need to take responsibility and accountability for their lives. The government cannot do it for them. Vote for realistic change.” – D

In response to our local brewery coverage

“It seems a day can’t go by without a brewery article gracing the top boxes of the Agenda. It got me thinking have we forgotten about the everyman? The man at the Duckworth’s happy hour that demands “what’s the closest thing you have to Bud Light?” Where’s his beer review? So, for those summer days on the lake, USNWC, or the lawn section trying to ignore Rob Thomas until the Counting Crows come on, here’s my 2015 Charlotte Big Beer review: Top 5.

• Budweiser: The King of Beers. Beech wood aged. What is beech wood? Do they mean beach wood? I taste a slight saltiness with just a hint of seagull turd. The ubiquitous king of beers is a good reminder that in history for every King Solomon there’s 100 deformed monsters walking around on brittle boned club feet because their family tree refused to branch (Tut I’m looking at you ya goofy bastard). Hmm…does beechwood have branches? I don’t know. I’m not a tree scientist. Anyway, it’s good for looking tougher than the average frat boy and for semi-ironic overly patriotic 4th of July parties. 2 stars.
• Bud Light: The Prince of Beers! I guess. I don’t really know the line of succession in the Busch kingdom. We can assume the only way Bud Ice gets to the top is a King Ralph scenario. Anyway, I like to go to a bar and order a Budweiser Light and watch the bartender try and mentally process that request. You get the same reaction when you ask a reggae band to play something by Robert Marley, but I digress. I don’t know what makes it lighter. Maybe less beech wood. Could be balsa wood. Company secret. Every year they run a promotion where you and some friends could win a trip on the Bud Light cruise. It’s nice to see a cruise ship where the vomiting isn’t caused by viruses and overflowing human waste, but don’t be fooled there WILL be viruses and that ship is a floating barge of human waste. Good for boating, river tubing, camping and other activities where nature is your bathroom. 1 and ½ stars.
• Coors Original: The Banquet Beer. Let’s be honest. It’s maybe the buffet beer. Maybe. This tan canned titan is much maltier than Coors Light and obscure enough that I’m confident it will be the new PBR for the hipster community. It’s a great beer for out-doing that frat dude trying to look tough with the Budweiser. Look for it in the far corner of your grocer’s refrigerator or banquets. Really, please, look for it at banquets. In fact, probably best to ask the head banqueter where it is. You don’t want to miss it. It’s brewed specifically for the occasion. Side prediction for 2016: increase in hipster banquets. 3 stars.
• Coors Light: Born in the Rockies. Most likely a water birth. The can changes color when it’s cold! Which is a good setup for a battle of the senses. After pounding 20 of these silver bladder bullets which is first to go: sense of sight or sense of touch? It’s visual vs. tactile in a Rocky Mountain throwdown! Speaking of senses, let’s be frank, if you’ve pounded 20 of these suckers your sense of taste can’t be trusted and your sense of shame is also under-developed. In Ireland they drink it in a glass with ice. Swear to God. Weirdest thing I’ve seen in a bar and I used to go to Dixies. Good for Irish ice harvests and, let’s say, tailgating. One star, one blue diamond, three green clovers.
• Miller Light: Throwback cans! Stubby bottles! This is a beer that says I want to put on some Peter Frampton, lay you down on shag carpet, and give you something that’s been described as “less filling”. Miller Light developed both the wide mouth can and aerator can all so you can drink the contents as fast as possible. They’re like the NASA of canning. Also like NASA they peaked in the 70’s and if you’re using them now you’re going to need a shuttle. Does anyone know what happened to the regular Miller? Has anyone ever seen one? Did it ever exist? If there’s no Miller how can there be a light version of it? Sure, there’s High Life, but that’s more of a weird uncle than the father. Unsettling. I bet there’s a killer backstory there. Good for people with wide mouths and 70’s time travelers. 2 stars.

There you have it. My review of Charlotte’s best beers: Giant Conglomerate Division. Since this is a beer review I guess I have to end with some form of toast. “Cheers!” seems a bit cliché. Those guys from OMB always say “Prost!” but I’ve never understood their obsession with the guy that hosted Survivor. I’ve always been more of a Maury man. So Povich! And enjoy!” – D