Lord of Lactose creams Denver rival in Wash Park milk-chug battle
Add Axios as your preferred source to
see more of our stories on Google.
The Bovine Baron (left) and the Lord of Lactose before their contest. Photo: Robert Sanchez/Axios
The Bovine Baron took on the Lord of Lactose in a Saturday milk-chugging duel at Washington Park.
State of play: An April Fool's prank turned 24-year-old Liam Poultney (aka the Bovine Baron) into a Mile High milk-swilling sensation — luring challengers and side-eyes, as the joke quickly curdles into something bigger.
Catch up quick: A friend secretly plastered Denver and Arapahoe County with flyers daring strangers to out-chug him earlier this month. One event, April 19 at Observatory Park, drew 100-plus challengers.
- But the Baron got his bovine butt beaten, drinking about two-thirds of a gallon in five minutes.
- He also barfed.
Zoom out: Enter the Lord of Lactose.
- Matthew Garis, 26, an accountant from Denton, Texas, saw the loss on Instagram, booked a flight, and arrived Saturday in a pinwheel hat.
In the room: Two half-gallons. Five minutes.
- The competitors stood back-to-back, took three paces, turned and chugged.
- Both went out fast.
Poultney paused — then paused again. Garis kept chugging.
- In the end, the Lord of Lactose finished his half-gallon in 2 minutes, 9 seconds, and Denver's own Bovine Baron made it only halfway.
Winners: Everyone.
- "It feels like there's whimsy in this, and we're missing a lot of whimsy in the world right now," the Baron said.
What's next: Poultney wants to turn milk-chugging into an annual event — possibly tied to a breast cancer fundraiser.
The bottom line: No one puked — this time.