Saying goodbye to your childhood home is emotional. Here’s how to make it a little easier

We moved there when I was six, and I’m now almost 33. A lot has happened in that house over the years, including milestone birthdays, high school and college graduations, learning to drive, the passing of my grandparents, and bringing my then-boyfriend (now husband) to my hometown for the first time.

• Needless to say, driving back up to New York to pack up the place and say goodbye was both physically and emotionally draining.

Why it matters: The pandemic and the wild real estate market has driven a lot of change for everyone so I know I’m not the only one having to say goodbye to a special home.

• Fortunately, there’s a good reason for the sad farewell. My parents are building a house here in Charlotte, making it much easier to see them regularly. (Editor’s note: Yes, more New Yorkers in Charlotte.)

If you’re like me and saying goodbye to a home you love, here are some strategies that made it easier for me to give our house the send-off it deserves.

(1) Do a farewell tour: While we were back in my hometown, we made sure to hit all of my favorite childhood spots. We went to the iconic ice cream place in the center of town that was the site of many family celebrations. We went on a hike in the woods behind my parents’ house where I used to play as a kid. We visited Wegmans, obviously. IYKYK.

(2) Write a letter to the new homeowner: When my husband and I bought our house at the end of last year, the previous homeowners wrote us the sweetest letter wishing us luck and telling us what the space meant to them. I decided to return the favor with my childhood home’s new owner. It helped me get closure knowing he’d hear about why the house was so special to my family.

(3) Try to see the house when it looks different from how you remember it: My parents had painted and staged the house for sale by the time we went up there for the last time. With my bright blue childhood room gone and most of our family photos packed already, it felt familiar, but not quite like the place I grew up in. This made saying goodbye a little easier.

(4) Don’t try to explain away your feelings: I was dealing with mixed emotions as I left the house for the last time, and kept trying to fast forward through my sadness. “I know it’s for a good reason and I’m lucky they’ll be closer” or “I don’t know why I’m so upset” I was saying. Then I realized: This is a milestone moment! It’s okay to feel a lot of different feelings simultaneously, including sadness.

(5) Take video and pictures: Before they painted the house, I had my parents take lots of pictures and videos of the home’s interior. Ten years from now when it’s hard to remember what it looked like, we can go back and peek at these shots.

(6) Don’t forget the family picture outside the house: We made sure to get a family picture in front of the home so we can remember what it (and we!) looked like in that moment in time.