Valentine’s Day is a dumb holiday and you know it

I know what you’re thinking, “Mary is just a bitter, lonely woman past her prime who resents anyone who has found love.” Yes, I am bitter and past my prime. But lonely? I am not lonely. In fact, I am happily dating a cute boy with whom I’m raising a Frenchie daughter out of wedlock.

But despite my relationship status, I still think Valentine’s Day is the most bull crap of all the holidays.

Some people hate Valentines’ Day because it’s a Hallmark holiday meant to increase consumer spending. This isn’t me. I work in advertising. Consumer spending is my dream. (Especially consumer spending at Bojangles’. Go eat all the Bojangles’.)

But back to Valentine’s Day.

From the very beginning, V-Day was bound to be a bull crap holiday.

Even its history is lame and confusing.

Take St. Valentine for instance. There were multiple dudes by this name and no one really knows which saint we’re supposed to be celebrating. His friend Cupid? Naked and weird. And don’t get me started on a fun “Valentine’s Day” custom in Ancient Rome where men would get to mate with any woman’s name they picked out from a bucket.

To me, modern day Valentine’s Day is about as romantic as Roman men picking names from a bucket.

It’s a day for people who need an excuse to feel in love.

People who need a day to put aside all their issues and go out for dinner and hold hands and post a photo on Instagram to show everyone how happy they are.

Let me ask you a serious question: How will fighting to get a 7 p.m. reservation at The Summit Room make you and your partner’s love any stronger? Couldn’t you go out February 13th? 15th? Or, call me crazy, the SIXTEENTH?

Love doesn’t need roses or teddy bears or a shitty box of chocolates you bought at Rite Aid.

Love is throwing your husband’s favorite pair of jeans into the wash because you’re pretty sure he’ll want to wear them this weekend.

Love is taking a short shower to leave your wife some hot water.

Love is letting your boyfriend take you to Crisp for lunch even though you hate Crisp.

What I’m trying to say is that love doesn’t need one day a year. Love needs reminders each and every day.

And if you’re single and busy trying to scrape together a date for Valentine’s Day: stop. Instead, spend your time finding someone who you can celebrate with all year long.