Here’s how to experience The Cellar at Duckworth’s

You’ve already been to Duckworth’s. It’s solid, you get it. I’m not writing about Duckworth’s. I’m writing about how to cellar (yes, I just used it as a verb).

Wear that one piece of hipster or trendy clothing that’s too cool for your normal self. I wore my camel hair blazer.

Go with people you actually like to talk with. Go deep with your conversation.

Ask your waiter for a tour of the beer cellar. You’ll want to call it a beer cave, but that’s a gas station thing.

Admire the rare and exotic beers.

Confidently choose one and tell your waiter.

He’ll bring it to the table and pour a little sip of it. Test it like a fine wine. Don’t giggle.

Order the house made waffle cones ($15). Don’t try to cut them — assign them out. Keep the ponza poke tuna for yourself.

You’re still hungry. Order the hand cut truffle fries ($9). Get extra sauce. Doesn’t matter than you don’t know what it is.

Switch to liquor. Don’t pick up the iPad — ask your waiter his favorite cocktail.

He’ll say East Village (their version of a Manhattan). He’s right. Order it.

Fries aren’t gone, but you need more food. Order the tuna tartare ($13). Comes with guac. Spicier than you thought, but you like it.

Go back into the outside world, drenched in rich conversation.