Cleaning out the mid-week notebook:

🤮 DPI despair: Venture capital returns still suck, despite the AI boom, per a new Carta analysis of nearly 3,000 funds.

• (I'm sorry. Was that too crass? I mean: The venture capital asset class is underperforming traditional return models.)

The vast majority of funds raised in the past decade have not yet returned their initial commitments, let alone generated excess returns.

• Only the 90th percentile of 2017 and 2018 vintage funds is above 1.0x DPI, at 1.37x and 1.12x, respectively. 75th percentile funds for those vintages don't make the cut.
• Yes, the percentage of funds with at least some DPI is rising, but those are quite literally pennies on the dollar.
• Not surprisingly, there's a growing divergence between TVPI and IRR, with the former rising and the latter falling.

🛢️ Not so fast: Carlyle early this year agreed to buy most foreign assets of Russia's Lukoil, which had been hammered by U.S. sanctions, but now it may have conflicted competition from the U.S. government itself.

• Billionaire investor Todd Boehly has secured backing for a rival bid from the U.S. International Development Finance Corp. (led by Leon Black's son Ben) and UAE national security adviser Tahnoon bin Zayed al-Nahyan, per the FT.
• As the FT writes: "Boehly's proposal would put the U.S. government in the unusual position of simultaneously bidding for the assets while another part of the administration decides their fate."

❓ Just asking: Private equity has been furiously buying and rolling up RIAs, but could it be doing long-term damage to the industry?

• Wealth advisory is something of an apprenticeship business, where younger advisors work hard with the expectation of inheriting older advisor economics. But PE-backed consolidation can put a crimp in those plans, thus reducing younger advisor incentives...

💰 Fund scoop: Captain Ventures, a new firm led by Tyler Hogge (ex-Pelion Venture Partners), raised $33 million for its debut fund.

• The pitch to founders (or "captains") is that Salt Lake City-based Hogge worked at three unicorns before becoming a VC, and that he can help Silicon Valley startups source Utah talent.
• The pitch to LPs was that Captain will focus on getting into top startups, regardless of being able to lead (which it hopes becomes a virtuous cycle).

🎟️ Reminder: You can request an invite to Axios BFD, taking place in NYC on Nov. 17, by going here.

Bamboo Insurance Services, a Midvale, Utah-based homeowners insurer backed by CVC Capital Partners and White Mountains, postponed an IPO that had been expected to price this week.

Why it's the BFD: This follows IPO postponements or delays for Holtec and SB Energy, and three makes a trend.

By the numbers: Bamboo had planned to sell 35 million shares at $18 to $20 per share, giving it a $3.3 billion valuation at the midpoint.

• It reports $14 million of net income on $173 million in revenue for the first half of 2026, and plans to list on the NYSE (BMB).
• Fellow insurer Orion180 went public last week at $12 per share, and closed trading yesterday at just $10.50.

The bottom line: The post-Labor Day IPO rush is slowing to a crawl.

• Baseten, an SF-based AI inference startup, is in talks to raise Series G funding at a $26b valuation, per Axios Pro. axios.link/4yYxR0h

• Tekever, a Portuguese developer of military drones, raised $580m in Series D funding at a $6.3b valuation. UC Investments and Baillie Gifford led, joined by Crescent Cove, Ventura Capital, and Iberis Capital. axios.link/47k11ed

🤿 Snorkel AI, an AI data development platform, raised $350m at a $3.5b post-money valuation. Insight Partners and S32 led, joined by Addition, March Capital, Blumberg Capital, Allegis Capital, Frontline, Standard, and Third Point Ventures, along with existing investors Greylock, Lightspeed, GV, Factory, Prosperity7, Walden Catalyst, and Wells Fargo. axios.link/4ryLm4k

🚑 Enveda, a Boulder, Colo.-based drug discovery startup that focuses on medicinal plants, raised $311m in Series E funding at a $2b valuation. Catalio led, joined by Durable Capital Partners, Iconiq, Lightspeed, Surveyor Capital, T. Rowe Price, Digitalis Ventures, Alderline Group and insiders Baillie Gifford, Premji Invest, FPV Ventures, True Ventures, Kinnevik, Dimension, Lifeforce Capital, and Lux Capital. axios.link/4AsEt8r

• Mirendil, an SF-based self-improving AI model developer launched by former Anthropic researchers, is reportedly in talks to raise at a $5b valuation led by Kleiner Perkins, per Bloomberg. axios.link/4xzVDOV

🚀 Hubble Network, a Seattle developer of space-based Bluetooth connectivity solutions, raised $200m in Series C funding at a $1.6b valuation. Smith Point Capital led, joined by Seraphim, Carthona Capital, Earthshot Ventures, RPM Ventures, and YC. axios.link/4zekEAH

• Numeral, a sales tax compliance platform, today announced a $100m Series C funding. Insight Partners led, joined by Salesforce Ventures, Geodesic, Benchmark, Mayfield, FCVC, YC, and Uncork. axios.link/46BxnB9

• Ema, a Mountain View, Calif.-based developer of enterprise agents, raised $77m in Series B funding. Creaegis led, joined by insiders Accel, S32, and Prosus. axios.link/4AuUPxx

🚑 Anaconda Biomed, a Spanish developer of thrombectomy catheters, raised $56m. Omega Funds led, joined by FOCO, Asabys, Ysios Capital, and CDTI. axios.link/4xKH0Zl

• Ande, an "AI-native network for corporate entertainment," raised $52m in seed and Series A funding from Lightspeed, Redpoint Ventures, Duration Ventures, Sierra Ventures, and Bain Capital Ventures. axios.link/4yWeFQM

⚡ Mojave Energy Systems, a Sunnyvale, Calif.-based maker of more-efficient HVAC systems, raised $19m in Series B funding, per Axios Pro. Fairtree Elevant Ventures led, joined by River Bay Investments, Cleo Capital, MetaTrail, At One Ventures, Fifth Wall, Myriad Venture Partners, and Starshot Capital. axios.link/4xAW4sh

🚑 Dialybrid, an Italian medical device startup, raised €15m in Series A funding. XGEN Venture led, joined by CDP Venture Capital. axios.link/4h6y8Ir

• NG.Cash, a provider of digital accounts to teens and young adults in Brazil, raised $15m led by Blockchain Capital, per Axios Pro. axios.link/4hKs1sv

• Nexstrom, a Singaporean wafer-scale platform for 2D semiconductor materials, raised $12m in seed funding. Xora Innovation led, joined by Foothill Ventures and Seeds. axios.link/4drAgbm

• Terasi, a Swedish developer of battlefield communications tech, raised €11m. NATO Innovation Fund and Join Capital led, joined by In-Q-Tel, D3, Navigare Ventures, Almi Invest, Onsight Ventures, Further Than Capital, and KTH Ventures. axios.link/3TnRKyq

🚑 StandardX, a U.K. isotope refinery for health care and energy, raised £10m in seed funding. Vsquared Ventures and East X Ventures led, joined by Firstminute capital, UKI2S, Brevan Howard Macro Venture, and Geometry. axios.link/4cYl4SV

⚡ American Supercritical, a developer of supercritical CO2 for powering gas turbines, raised $8m in pre-seed funding. Silent Ventures led, joined by Riot Ventures, Harpoon, Reveille VC, Hillwood, Mana Ventures, Climate Capital, and Alumni Ventures. axios.link/4ya9T1P

• Mika, a German tax and accounting platform for SMEs, raised €6m in seed funding led by Smedvig Ventures. axios.link/3V3I0dq

• F13, a German developer of models for generating vector graphics, raised $5m in pre-seed funding led by Credo Ventures and Point Nine Capital. axios.link/47k1IUR

• Beagle Labs, an NYC-based property intelligence platform for commercial insurers, raised $4.1m in pre-seed funding. Chingona Ventures led, joined by Sovereign's Capital, Remarkable Ventures, C2 Ventures, South Loop Ventures, and Red Bike Capital. axios.link/4hiY9TB

• Snag, a Brooklyn-based platform for housing renters, raised $4m. Slow Ventures led, joined by Precursor Ventures, Long Journey Ventures, and Chamaeleon. axios.link/4hjaHKB

• SOL, an AI chief of staff, raised $4m from General Catalyst, Nexus Venture Partners, DeVC, and Peercheque. axios.link/4hpLrT7

• Dash Dog Food, a premium fresh and frozen dog food brand, raised $1.5m in seed funding led by Voltage Ventures. axios.link/4hl7xpR

🚑 Ascend Learning, backed by Blackstone and CPP Investments, acquired M7 Health, an automated health scheduling and staffing platform. M7 had raised around $17m from Threshold Ventures, Lakehouse Ventures, First Round Capital, and 25m Health. axios.link/4Aq2xcc

🚑 AVS Bio, an Arlington Capital Partners portfolio company, acquired Biorbyt, a U.K. supplier of bio-reagents, antibodies, proteins, and other biomaterials for life science research. axios.link/4AuUNFT

• Blackstone and EQT completed their $6.6b buyout of Spanish waste management firm Urbaser from Platinum Equity. axios.link/4kAh9OT

• CD&R and Warburg Pincus are in talks to acquire Canaccord Wealth from Canaccord Genuity (TSX: CF), per Reuters. axios.link/4Arimzr

🚑 Command Medical Products, an Argosy Healthcare Partners portfolio company, acquired IMATS, a Costa Rican provider of injection molding and tooling services. axios.link/4rqV20E

• Glacialis (fka Frigoveneta), an Ambienta portfolio company, acquired Madefrigot, an Italian maker of industrial refrigeration systems and air handling units. axios.link/4yR6yVo

• Granite Creek Capital Partners invested in Climarock, a Warsaw, Mo.-based provider of insulation panel systems for aboveground storage tanks. axios.link/4hf4y2c

• Lone View Capital invested in HappyCo, a Carlsbad, Calif.-based property operations platform for multifamily housing. axios.link/4Apm8sW

⚡ MML Capital invested in Dalcour Maclaren, a U.K. utilities and infrastructure consultancy. axios.link/4hGtAsi

• Odyssey Investment Partners acquired Falcon Gases, a packaged industrial gas provider. axios.link/4xKMZxh

• Peakline Partners acquired Kalon, a Stamford, Conn.-based mid-ticket equipment finance platform. axios.link/4xBHalq

⚡ Pfingsten acquired Next Point Bearing Group, a Valencia, Calif.-based distributor of precision and miniature bearings and related power transmission components. axios.link/4AsnxPD

• Ridgeline Roofing & Restoration, a Bertram Capital portfolio company, acquired Advantage Roofing & Exteriors, which serves Southwest Michigan. axios.link/4hmOifB

⚡ SMT Energy, a Boulder, Colo.-based developer of battery energy storage systems, secured up to $268m in equity from Climate Adaptive Infrastructure. axios.link/4cVc8xF

• Symera Partners acquired CIS Security, a U.K. provider of physical security services. axios.link/4yezDKK

• Tamarix Equity Partners invested in Halal Shack, an Albany, N.Y.-based operator of fast casual restaurants on college campuses. axios.link/3V3Ny7H

• Verdence, a Hunt Valley, Md.-based wealth advisor backed by Wealth Partners Capital Group, acquired Harvest Investment Consultants, an RIA with $564m in AUM. axios.link/4yenfdC

• Airtel Money, an Africa-focused fintech, plans to float at least $800m of existing shares on the LSE at a valuation of $8b-$9b, per the WSJ. axios.link/4y6OJ4R

• Carro, a Singapore-based online auto marketplace, is considering what would be the first Nasdaq/SGX dual listing, per Bloomberg. It's raised over $1b from firms like SoftBank, B Capital Group, Koru Partners, Insignia Ventures, and Golden Gate Ventures. axios.link/4ydwPxq

• Live Oak Acquisition VI, a SPAC formed by Live Oak Merchant Partners, raised $200m in its IPO. axios.link/4y1ORlL

• Sensofusion, a Finnish counter-drone developer, plans to raise €300m in a Helsinki IPO. axios.link/4AsAPLN

• Graza, a VC-backed olive oil brand, hired Lazard to explore a sale, per Axios Pro. axios.link/4hDMeBb

• Lone Star Funds is weighing options for Italian coffee machine maker Evoca, including a sale or handover to creditors, per Bloomberg. axios.link/4yfja94

🎢 Jana Partners called on Six Flags (NYSE: FUN) to explore a sale, per the WSJ. axios.link/4xKCQ3F

• Pollen Street (LSE: POLN), a U.K. private equity firm, said it's exploring strategic options that could include a take-private transaction. axios.link/46A5Vnj

• Royal Caribbean Group (NYSE: RCL) agreed to acquire a 50% stake in Sandals Resorts International for $3b. axios.link/47fNtjW

• Upwind Security, valued by VCs at $3.8b, acquired Aegis, an Israeli cybersecurity startup focused on AI-generated attacks, per Axios Pro. The deal was valued at between $25m-$50m in stock. axios.link/3TdANXD

• WSP Global (TSX: WSP) ended its pursuit of Arcadis, a listed Dutch engineering and consulting group that has rejected two unsolicited approaches. axios.link/4yRQWRy

• Connect Ventures, a European pre-seed firm, held a $55m first close on a fifth fund targeting $80m. axios.link/3TfERXp

• Lightcone Ventures, led by Prime Movers Lab vets Brad Pruente and Anton Brevde, is raising its debut fund, per an SEC filing.

• Sundance Growth raised $250m for its second fund. axios.link/4hGG6Io

• Tal Broda, former VP of compute at OpenAI, joined Khosla Ventures as a partner. axios.link/4hKy3cD

• Michelle Daubar is joining Engine Ventures as a partner and head of IR. She previously was with Oak HC/FT. axios.link/4xB1gfL

• Suzanne Flannery joined Grafine Partners as a managing director and head of strategic initiatives. She previously was at Neuberger Berman. axios.link/4AtctSh

• Tucker Laurens joined Harris Williams as a managing director of financial sponsors. He previously was with Solomon Partners. axios.link/47iM4Jm

• Simon Lyons joined Goldman Sachs as co-head of U.K. investment banking, per Reuters. He previously was with Ardea Partners. axios.link/3V14hsl