What I'm about to suggest will be unfathomable to most, and risible to some. But here goes:

• It's time to feel sympathy for Harvard's endowment managers, who find themselves in an impossible situation.

The big picture: There is no amount of risk management that could have accounted for what's now facing the country's largest and richest school.

• Like all investors, Harvard is facing macroeconomic turmoil. Like all investors in private equity and venture capital funds, it's facing a lengthy dearth of distributions.
• Like other research universities, Harvard is prone to major reductions in NIH matching grants and other sorts of federal funding.
• Like a smaller subset of very wealthy schools, Harvard soon may need to pay excise taxes on endowment income.
• Like no one else, Harvard may lose all of its federal funding, pending the outcome of its legal battle with President Trump.

By the numbers: The official size of Harvard's endowment is $53.2 billion, of which the vast majority is restricted funds. And even of unrestricted funds, many of the assets are illiquid — with a 39% allocation to private equities and 32% to hedge funds.

• In other words, it's not like a bank account from which the university can make withdrawals at any time for any purpose.
• All of that data is as of June 20, 2024. No word yet on more recent figures. We do know that the endowment increased its risk appetite in fiscal 2023, but also hedged more against equities in fiscal 2024.

Zoom in: Each year, Harvard asks its endowment for a chunk of money. At this point, such distributions account for nearly 40% of Harvard's operating budget.

• No final decisions have been made yet, but expectations are that this year's check will easily top the endowment's 5% distribution target. And likely a higher percentage than what was required coming out of the Great Financial Crisis or pandemic.
• In the meantime, the school (not the endowment) is raising $750 million via a bond issuance and could choose to do another.

Look ahead: One way that Harvard's endowment could become more liquid would be to launcha large private equity secondaries process, as Yale is currently doing (for its first time ever), but right now it doesn't have anything new in market.

• Sources say that Harvard's endowment did quietly complete a sizable PE secondaries sale around the end of last year, although that was more about standard portfolio pruning than crisis management.
• Other schools doing secondary sales around the same time, for between $500 million and $800 million, included Princeton, University of Michigan and UC Regents.
• Speaking of that Yale sale, the headline number is $6 billion, but the ultimate deal is likely to be closer to be less than half of that. And it's moving quick, with a May 5 pricing target and June 30 close.

The bottom line: There has never been a worse time to be part of (what everyone at Harvard believes to be) the best school.

Source: Giphy

UPS (NYSE: UPS) has agreed to pay around $1.6 billion to acquire Andlauer Healthcare Group (TSX: AND), a Canadian provider of health-care logistics and transportation solutions.

Why it's the BFD: This may put pressure on rivals FexEx and DHL to boost their own efforts in health care, where margins are higher than in traditional package delivery.

By the numbers: UPS will pay C$55 per share in cash, representing a 31% premium over yesterday's closing price. The deal is expected to close by year-end.

• Andlauer founder and CEO Michael Andlauer also owns by NHL's Ottawa Senators, which are down 2-0 to the Toronto Maple Leafs.

The bottom line: UPS isn't a stranger to M&A in health care, where most biologics require cold-chain management, having previously paid €870 million for Italy's Bomi Group in 2022 and an undisclosed amount last year for Germany's Frigo-Trans.

• Last year it disclosed a goal of hitting $20 billion in health-care revenue by 2026, double its 2023 tally.

🚑 Neuralink, Elon Musk's brain-computer interface startup, is seeking to raise around $500m at an $8.5b pre-money valuation, per Bloomberg. axios.link/4lJUkrW

🌎 Electra, a Colorado-based green iron startup, raised $186m in Series B funding co-led by Capricorn Investment Group and Temasek. axios.link/3GpKA62

🚑 Granite Bio, a Swiss immunology startup, raised $70m in Series B funding led by Forbion and Sanofi Ventures. It also disclosed a $30m Series A round co-led by Versant Ventures and Novartis Venture Fund. granitebio.com

🚑 Grove Biopharma, a Chicago-based biologics company, raised $30m in Series A funding led by DCVC Bio. Eli Lilly, nVivium Capital, Walder Ventures, Gradiant Corporation, and Mansueto Investments participated. axios.link/430gKxG

• Symbiotic, a universal staking infrastructure startup, raised $29m in Series A funding led by Pantera Capital, with participation from Coinbase Ventures. axios.link/3GmaKGJ

• Alternative Payments, an embedded B2B payments fintech for service-based businesses, raised $22m in seed and Series A funding co-led by MissionOG and Third Prime, per Axios Pro. axios.link/4cMfIJb

🚑 Overture Life, an IVF automation startup, raised $20.6m led by Overwater Ventures with GV participating, per Axios Pro. axios.link/42pBD5o

🚑 Synthetic Design Lab, a Burlingame, Calif., developer of antibody-drug conjugates, raised $20m in seed funding from such backers as Playground Global and Godfrey Capital. axios.link/3GpooJp

• ChEmpower, a Beaverton, Ore., semiconductor materials startup, raised $18.7m in Series A funding. M Ventures and Rhapsody Venture Partners co-led, joined by insiders Intel Capital, Pangaea Ventures, Foothill Ventures, In-Q-Tel, and TEL VC. chempower-corp.com

• Emmi AI, an Austrian developer of simulation tech for industrial engineering, raised €15m in seed funding from Speedinvest, 3VC, Serena, and PUSH. emmi.ai

• Ravenna, a Seattle-based provider of enterprise service management software, raised $15m in pre-seed and seed funding co-led by Madrona and Khosla Ventures. ravenna.ai

🚀 Okapi:Orbits, a German space traffic management startup, raised €13m in seed funding. Ventech led, joined by Matterwave Ventures and Amadeus APEX Technology Fund. axios.link/4cJa2zr

• Scamnetic, an internet scam detection and prevention startup, raised $13m in Series A funding led by Roo Capital. scamnetic.com

• Hokodo, a U.K. digital trade finance platform, raised €10m. Korelya Capital and Opera Tech Ventures co-led, joined by Mundi Ventures and Notion Capital. axios.link/42GSvn0

• Neurolabs, a British image recognition platform, raised $7.8m in Series A funding led by Nauta, with participation from LAUNCHub, Lunar Ventures, and Techstart. axios.link/447QS4e

• MagicBlock, a real-time engine for decentralized games and apps on Solana, raised $7.5m in seed funding. Lightspeed led, joined by Maven11, Delphi Digital, Robot Ventures, Mechanism Capital, Equilibrium, and Pivot Global. magicblock.xyz

• Cakewalk, a British AI agent developer, raised $7.5m in seed funding led by Kindred Capital and Vertex Ventures. axios.link/4jntR1J

• Adaptive, an SF-based vibe coding startup, raised $7m in seed funding. Pebblebed led, joined by Conviction Partners, Jake Paul's Anti Fund, Radical Ventures, and David Baszucki. axios.link/4cKNGxJ

• Isembard, a U.K. startup for reshoring critical industries, raised £7m in seed funding. Notion Capital led, joined by 201 Ventures, Basis Capital, Forward Fund, Material Ventures, Neverlift Ventures, and NP-Hard Ventures. axios.link/42KJ5GW

• Amplifier Security, an Atlanta-based autonomous user security platform, raised $5.6m led by TechOperators. amplifiersecurity.com

• HelloSky, a San Diego-based executive search platform, raised $5.5m in seed funding from Caldwell Partners, Karmel Capital, True Capital Partners, and Hunt Scanlon Ventures. axios.link/42rwdqr

🚑 Poppins, a French provider of dyslexia digital therapy for kids, raised €5m. Racine² led, joined by Bpifrance, Eurazeo, Kurma Partners, BNP Paribas Développement, and Verve Ventures. axios.link/42Lu0VN

• Spur, a NY-based AI testing platform, raised $4.5m from First Round Capital, Pear VC, Neo, Conviction, Liquid2Ventures, and Predictive Venture Partners. axios.link/4ijtzYA

🚑 Ovo Labs, a U.K.-German women's fertility startup raised £4 co-led by Creator Fund and LocalGlobe. axios.link/3YdhxsD

• Durin, an El Segundo, Calif.-based mining automation startup, raied $3.5m in pre-seed funding led by 8090 Industries, per TechCrunch. axios.link/42DEvKF

🌎 Reusables, a Canadian recycling software developer for food-service providers, raised C$2.6m. StandUp Ventures and Amplify Capital co-led, joined by Sandpiper Ventures and Emend Vision Fund. axios.link/4iwDcmO

• Azuria, a St. Louis-based water infrastructure firm owned by New Mountain Capital, acquired three companies: TSW Utility Solutions, AM-Liner East, and C.K. Masonry. axios.link/4jr1qjJ

• Bpifrance acquired a minority stake in Septeo, a French legal tech company owned by Hg. axios.link/44CnNhi

• Kanbrick acquired LTI, a Hatfield, Pa.-based provider of materials testing and calibration services. labtesting.com

• Lightyear Capital invested in King Risk Partners, a U.S. retail brokerage. king-insurance.com

• MPE Partners invested in Intermatic, a Spring Grove, Ill.-based maker of electrical and mechanical controls. intermatic.com

• Security 101, a Gemspring Capital portfolio company, acquired Integrated Systems & Services, an Eatontown, N.J.-based security integrator. security101.com

• Truelink Capital invested in Channel Factory, a Beverly Hills, Calif.-based adtech company. channelfactory.com

• Logisteed, a Japanese logistics operator owned by KKR, picked Morgan Stanley to lead a Tokyo IPO, per Bloomberg. axios.link/42tfOSo

• Datadog (Nasdaq: DDOG) acquired Metaplane, a Boston-based data observability platform, that had raised over $20m from firms like Felicis, Khosla Ventures, Flybridge, YC, Stage 2 Capital, and Snowflake. metaplane.dev

• BT Group (LSE: BT) agreed to sell its remaining Italian business to local telco Retelit. axios.link/42O3KKw

• Daishi Hokuetsu Financial (Tokyo: 7327) is in advanced talks to merge with fellow Japanese regional lender Gunma Bank (T: 8334), per Bloomberg. axios.link/3EB5JcU

• Fixated, backed by Eldridge Industries, acquired creator economy-focused talent agencies CAMP Talent and Moondust Management. axios.link/42q5sCN

🌮 Jack in the Box (Nasdaq: JACK) hired BofA to explore options for Del Taco Restaurants, including a possible sale, per Bloomberg. axios.link/4jlwlxF

• Kimberly-Clark (NYSE: KMB) has short-listed three strategic suitors for its global tissue unit, which could fetch around $4b with binding bids due next month, per Reuters. axios.link/42rx8qT

• WorkStep, an SF-based employee engagement platform that's raised over $50m from firms like FirstMark Capital and New Roads Capital Partners, acquired WorkHound, a Chattanooga, Tenn.-based employee feedback management platform for the supply chain that had raised over $13m from firms like Level Equity. axios.link/4jyQSyM

🌎 Ardabelle Capital, a new climate-focused PE firm, secured backing from TPG's GP stakes platform. axios.link/4irnppf

• CIV, a VC firm focused on "companies reshaping critical industries," raised $200m for its debut fund. It's led by CEO Patrick Maloney (founder of Inspire Energy Capital), while partners include Abhijoy Mitra (ex-Coatue) and Jeff Rosenthal (co-creator of Summit Series). axios.link/4cM1BDr

• Fluent Ventures, an SF-based firm led by Alex Lazarow, raised $40m for its debut fund. axios.link/3EIqNhC

• General Atlantic and UBS are in talks about forming a private credit partnership, per Bloomberg. axios.link/4jlvUn1

• LLR Partners raised $2.45b for its seventh flagship midmarket PE fund. llrpartners.com

• RockawayX launched a $125m early-stage crypto VC fund. axios.link/3EDjkjU

• Nic DiLoretta joined Global Infrastructure Partners as a managing director. He previously led real assets for Aksia. axios.link/4jPMZWc

• Lawrence Elbaum and Patrick Gadson are leaving law firm Vinson & Elkins to join the activism defense practice at Sullivan & Cromwell, per the WSJ. axios.link/3GjuniI