Apr 8, 2022 - Sports

How to fake it this Twins season

Carlos Correa and Byron Buxton slap hands
Up-the-middle duo Carlos Correa and Byron Buxton could be deadly for the Twins. Photo: Brace Hemmelgarn/Minnesota Twins/Getty Images

The Minnesota Twins start their season Friday at 3:10pm at Target Field against the Seattle Mariners. If you're not a die-hard fan, here's a guide to faking it.

Conversation starter: You are always safe saying the Twins need better pitching — that's been the case for 15 years. This season is no different.

Everyone's favorite: Center fielder Byron Buxton is perhaps the most exciting player in baseball, but you never stop worrying that he will get injured.

The Correa conundrum: The Twins somehow signed one of the best baseball players in the game, but one involved with the Houston Astros sign-stealing scandal from 2017 and 2018. We can forgive Carlos Correa for this only if he plays great.

We don't talk about New York: The Twins' biggest rival is the Yankees, who have knocked Minnesota out of the playoffs six straight times since 2003.

  • Yankees fans don't feel the same way about the Twins. They barely know we exist.

How to change the topic from baseball: Mention that manager Rocco Baldelli is a Deadhead (Grateful Dead fan) or Phish superfan. Then pivot to music.

  • If that doesn't work, wait until hot prospect Jose Miranda gets called up from St. Paul and mention that he is a second cousin to Lin-Manuel Miranda. Now you're talking musicals.

Two stars in the making:

  • Alex Kirilloff: Should be hitting doubles off the Target Field limestone all summer.
  • Jhoan Duran: Throws 100 mph and could be a future closer.

Who to follow: There's a great stable of Twins beat writers, including Aaron Gleeman, Dan Hayes, Phil Miller, and Betsy Helfand.

Ballpark hacks: Long line at Gates 34 and 6? Nick's always had luck at Gate 14.

  • Biking to the ballpark on the Cedar Lake Trail is great. Tons of racks available, too.

Best value at Target Field: Holy Land and the mega cans of PBR are gone this year, so the $11 Turkey To Go sandwich and the $5 Bud and Bud Lights are the best bang for your buck this summer.

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