🏴☠️ 2022 Gasparilla Pirate Festival "definitely on"
An anxious sentiment has begun to rattle the residents of Tampatown as word circulated here that Jose Gasparilla, king of the lustiest pirates, was preparing for what could be his bloodiest attack yet later this month.
Driving the news: Several of the pirate king's prisoners, having escaped from his mysterious island haunt, made their way to the mainland by raft and immediately warned of the bloody butcher’s preparations, telling of royal arsenals and great mounds of pistols, dirks and daggers.
Yes, but: Tampa's maritime defenses are greatly weakened due to back-to-back boat parades to celebrate sports championships in 2021.
What's next: The invasion is planned for 11:30am on Jan. 19. Mayor Jane Castor has a history of welcoming the pirates, so Tampans should expect much pillaging and debauchery to follow the conquering.
- In spite of recently climbing COVID cases, Tampa Mayor's office spokesperson Adam Smith and event organizers Ye Mystic Krewe both say the Gasparilla Pirate Festival is "definitely on. Get your beads ready. Let's hope COVID cooperates."
Flashback: Here's a look at Gasparilla in 1922.
Editor's note: This story's headline has been corrected to reflect that this year's festival is not the 100th Gasparilla Pirate Festival.
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