How to call out if Philly wins the Fall Classic

Thought experiment: Let’s say the Phillies take it all this weekend. People have a litttle too much fun. Enough that maybe Monday's a good day to stay home from work.

• Just hypothesizing here, guys.

OK, but how might someone call out?

There’s raw honesty:

• "Look, boss, even if I come in, I'm telling you I'm gonna be about as productive as Houston's Alex Bregman was at the plate."
• "I'm like the Phillies bullpen. I should get an extra day off for rest."

You play the sympathy card:

• "I ate too many Schwarberfest hoagies and free tacos. Call a medic!"
• "Sorry, boss. I stubbed a toe when I was 'Dancing on My Own.' Gotta get an X-ray."

Or just play the wild card:

• "I was on my way in, but Lance McCullers Jr. is my Uber driver, so I had to make a quick run home."
• “Someone stole my sign-in sheet, so I’mma head out.”